"A hobo wanders and works. A tramp will work. A bum won't work." --My grandfather
"You can have anything you want. You just can't have everything you want." --My mom
Readers, if you've been following me on this journey, you know that I've been living and dating in all different places this year: Detroit, Chapel Hill, Vermont, and soon, New Orleans. I've deliberately designed my work and my life so I can live this way for a little while (not forever! I promise!), and I honestly believe that this is not in conflict with my dream of finding a great love. In this age of skype and cellphones, where we all have a zillion frequent flyer miles and lightweight laptops, why shouldn't location be, at least for now, just a detail?
I'm starting to question my own logic, and so is Mr. #39 (the nerd again). We met for breakfast this morning, which was delicious (who doesn't love Vermont maple syrup?!!?), but our conversation centered around my next move, and left him looking forlorn and me wondering if my current lifestyle is not conducive to finding love.
What do you think, readers? Can a nomadic lifestyle work in conjunction with real love, or do I only get one or the other?
I believe that a nomadic lifestyle is NOT conducive to finding and keeping true love. Love needs time and fostering, and in one's abscence, can wane. Sorry, but unless you find someone who enjoys your absence as much as your presence, you'll be searching for something unattainable.
ReplyDeleteYou know how I feel about this. You can't do both. I know I would basically think "Well, she's not really available or present." We'll miss lots of wonderfully banal things like going to the grocery store or writing together. Skype is great. I love it, but it would not replace a real and live partner. Of course, as you know, what would I know about relationships anyway.
ReplyDeleteI think if you were already involved in a solid relationship and circumstances forced you to be apart for a while, then it might be possible to maintain the relationship via Skype. But trying to get to know someone new when you're often physically separated has got to be extremely challenging. People behave differently on a day-to-day basis than they do during bouts of intense short-term togetherness, so it'd be hard to gauge if the relationship could work long-term.
ReplyDeleteI have never skyped. I have never had flier miles. I do not have a laptop. So not everything has to be mobile and current.
ReplyDeleteLove takes time to blossom. To be found. Unless you find someone abroad who is flying in the wind like you lately, it will be hard. But maybe since you are continuing to move around that that's the big love you currently need.